OFFICIAL - Georgia and Sam now an official couple and Georgia’s mum appproves of Sam : ’he’s like Prince Charming’
This Morning
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TRUE LIES - the Lie Detector test : don’t these boys know how to game a machine?
Love Island YouTube
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FIRST FALL OUT - just one week to the finale and Jack and Dani fall out over the Lie Detector results
Love Island YouTube
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DR KISS KISS - who can forget immortal lyrics from 5000 Volts back in 1976? : ’Da-da, it’s Doctor Kiss Kiss, And you’re gonna feel my vibe thru and thru’. Check out the TOTP vid : orgasmic squealing at end cut by Beeb
Dr. Kiss Kiss TOTP ( 1976 )
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OOH DR ALEX! - Alexandra seems to have felt the Dr Alex vibe : ’he grabbed my hand...opened his shorts...TBH it all happened very fast’. Cut to suggestive ice cream consumption from the post-vibing couple. Last word from Dr Al : ’It’s never easy in this place, never an easy ride’. Is there going to be a happy ending and / or orgasmic squealing?
Love Island YouTube
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HIDEAWAY - ’Al squared’ hit the Hideaway : ’I ve brought a little surprise for Alexanda...I’m not actually a doctor, I’m a stripper’
Love Island
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LOVE ISLAND LITE? - check out promo vid for MTV couple show TLOTL? (True Love Or True Lies?) : Love Island Lite? You decide!
MTV International youtube
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TLOTL? VOICE - Danny Dyer is the voice of True Love Or True Lies?, seen here with a little girl called Dani : ’Me and the Wife have come to accept the fact that we was put on the planet to reproduce Love Islanders.....bollocks...oh well...embrace it....good luck in 2028 Sunnie....❤️.’
Danny Dyer Instagram
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SURFER GIRL - Dr Alex has second thoughts about Alexandra : first thoughts now about a bit of body surfing with new Laura?
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TLOTL? HOST - True Love Or True Lies? starts Monday 6 Aug, hosted by Maya Jama, seen below on Love Island Aftersun : iamduchess msg ’Perfection 😍’. Hips Don’t Lie.
Maya Jama Instagram
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GOSSIP GIRLS - new Jack kisses new Laura who stays shtum but new Jack tells old Jack, who tells Dani who tells the other girls so the chain reaction means that everyone knows except Stephanie who is not happy - ’I didn’tknow that...why has no one told me...’ ’Do you not think that Laura should have told you?’ asks old Laura, helpfully.
Love Island YouTube
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GOSSIP GUYS - ’they talk a lot don’t they?’ Love Island guys give good goss. As Uma Thurman tells John Travolta in ’Pulp Fiction’ : ’When you little scamps get together, you’re worse than a sewing circle’
PhilloMN YouTube
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GEORGIA ON MY MIND - ’Other arms reach out to me,
Other eyes smile tenderly, Still in peaceful dreams I see,
The road leads back to you’ (Ray Charles)
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SERIAL SNOGGER - perhaps not as poetic as Ray but heartfelt all the same, Sam says ’I just can’t keep my hands off Georgia’
Radio Times YouTube
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BETTA - Sam raises his verbal game with ’Georgia is playing
on my mind’ : that’s ’Georgia on my mind’ + ’is playing’. Nice wordplay, Sam. Say it again, Sam. Please yourselves, see if LoveIslander cares.
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GETTING IT ON - new Jack gets on board with new Laura al fresco on the sofa whilst Alex, bored in bed indoors, applies the lip balm in anticipation of some serious surf exposure. No need for that Alex cos you’ve missed the wave and you’re now high and dry.
Love Island YouTube
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HANG TEN - is new Jack ’hanging ten’ with new Laura on her surfboard? LoveIslander has no idea, either. Check out out Urban Dictionary. Loveislander apologises but it was that Dani Dyer wot started all the surfing double-entendres.
Urban Dictionary
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SURF’S UP - ’a new girl’s come in wiv a surf board and you want to jump on it’ : Dani not happy with Alex who thinks that new Laura is hot but she’s already waxing up the board for new Jack who has just split from old Laura so it looks like Doc is gonna have to ride another wave
Love Island YouTube
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CONFUSED? - why the surfing-based euphemisms? New Laura is a pro surfer. Clear now?
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SURFSPEAK - LoveIslander polishing up the surf slang as we speak. For example, ’gave the stick a Chinese wax job, didn’t want to eat it and didn’t fancy a backdoor so did a bottom turn and tried to go frontside
but got caught inside by the doggy door and ended up taking dirty lickings before re-entry’. It’s all in www.surfing-waves.com. Try it yourslf, it’s easy.
Surfing Waves
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OUTSIDE? - Jack breaks up with old Laura claiming concerns about their compatability ’on the outside’
Love Island YouTube
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THE TIME OF MY LIFE - Ellie Brown says ’The villa is the most amazing place but emotions are high, from the bottom of my heart to anybody I hurt along the way I am so sorry’
Elle Brown Instagram
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PREDICTION - ’Jack and Dani will be engaged by this time next year. Living with them, you can see how in love they are’ (Ellie Brown in the Daily Star)
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THANKS, BUT NO THANKS - Barry’s Bootcamp trainer / model Harry Sellers has turned down Love Island producers three times : ginacarpenito msg ’oh look at that gorgey face’...
Harry Sellers Instagram
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...don’t tell The Flackster because she’s got a thing about younger men called Harry (Prince H, H Styles)
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JAURA - Jack (that’s him, head in hands) reveals concerns about his connection to old Laura in a deep and meaningful with old Josh...
Love Island YouTube
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...no probs, remain loyal by cracking on with young (sorry, that should be new) Laura and there’s no need to change the couple name
UK News YouTube
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PAY ATTENTION – public vote established Megan + Wes, Georgia + Sam and Ellie + Charlie as the 3 least popular couples. Ellie + Charlie left the island. Later the 4 most popular couples had to choose which of Megan + Wes and Georgia + Sam also had to leave and went for the latter but…
Love Island YouTube
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…Georgia and Sam given choice of 1) leaving immediately or 2) staying provided they split and did not re-couple. After some soul-searching they went for option 2 and then had to go on dates with the newbies. Life on Love Island can be tough!
Love Island YouTube
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